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The Voice Actor Feedback Forum

Script Genres > English Children > Narration > eLearning & Education

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    Azgul Castle

    Script:

    Welcome to Azgul Castle.

    A castle is much more than just a fortress. Castles are homes as well; homes to many people, not just the King or Queen. In fact, not only is a castle a huge place where people live but it is also a place of work. Men and women who work in castles are known as servants.

    In Azgul Castle, there are many servants who serve the Monarch. In fact, there are over 100 servants who work in the castle. There are some particularly important servants though. Firstly, there is the cook who feeds everyone and spends time in the kitchen. Meat is cooked on a spit over a fire and a large cauldron is used to cook stews.

    Then, there is the steward. This person makes sure that the whole castle runs smoothly. They give orders to the: cook, gardeners, tailors, washerwomen – you name it! Even the court jester gets their instructions from the steward.

    Finally, there is the constable. This person is the chief guard of the castle and spends time in the Place of Arms or the dungeon because they are in charge of security. Azgul Castle’s Constable is a man called Hugo Bloodhorn. He’s a devilish and vindictive man. You wouldn’t want to cross him.

    68 people have played this

    Practice Recording:

    Click to hear StefaneVan's recording

    Hi! I'm trying out a new mic as well as working on my recording space and editing skills. Thoughts? Feedback on performance is also welcome ;-) This is taken from a book intended for primary school age children. Thanks!

    /sites/default/files/script-recordings/user-109508/script-recording-88296.mp3

    Peer Feedback:

    Hi Stefane,

    With regard to recording quality: your voice came over quite clear on the new mic. Your recording space however, was rather "noisy" (by professional VO standards). Was there a TV/radio on another room?

    The read was good, overall. I'm glad you explained that the excerpt was from a book intended for primary school age children, otherwise I might have thought the read was a bit too "upbeat".
    The only performance/editing criticism I have to offer is that your inhalations (breaths) were a bit more prominent than they should have been.

    Peer Feedback:

    Even though primary school children are autonomous, self-aware little beings, they may not fully understand some larger concepts and big vocabulary words. One way to help that get through is to slow down a bit and leave some space in between those pieces of thought (paragraphs). This text is a "list" of the different inhabitants of the castle and what their function is to serve the whole, so give each one their due.

    IMHO, some of this text is difficult and confusing. An example to me is the almost implied condescension in the line:
    "Men and women who work in castles are known as servants."
    Duhhhh! I think a six-year-old can understand that concept. So don't "dumb it down." Kids know when you're talking down to them.

    But then, take the next to last sentence:
    "He’s a devilish and vindictive man."
    What six-year-old understands what "vindictive" means with out an explanation? That's where your tone on the delivery comes in. You have to make him sound nasty. Wrinkle up your nose like he smells bad and scrunch your face up. Even if the child doesn't understand the word's meaning, they'll get the overall concept.

    The delivery is in the "coloring" of the text. Not to be confused with a bedtime story, sing-songy-ness.

    I am assuming that this is a raw file without any added processing FX and done in a single take (no obvious edits), so there are some extraneous breath sounds, mouth noise and some plosive popping. And I do hear something in the background that I can't really identify, but it's there. (A howling dog?) The space is a little live and reverberate, but the mic seems to suit your voice.

    The big plus is that you don't seem to have the sharp sibilant S issue that many women voice artists have.

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    Bus Safety Rules

    Script:

    Hey kids...Be cool and follow these rules. Remember, school bus safety starts with you every morning and every afternoon. So just keep these 10 rules in mind. They’re easy to learn and simple to follow. And they start before the bus ever stops. So be cool...and follow these rules. First, be on time for the bus. Second, never run to or from the bus. Third, stand back from the curb. Fourth, don’t push or shove. Fifth, stay in your seat. Sixth, don’t yell or shout. Seventh, always obey the driver. Eight, wait for the driver’s signal before crossing. Ninth, always cross at least 10 feet in front of the bus. And tenth, never crawl under the school bus.

    32 people have played this

    Practice Recording:

    Click to hear finateria's recording

    Hi. I'm new to voice over and am getting some practice in before scheduling my first private coaching session. I chose this script because I am a teacher and we are fast approaching a new school year. I'm looking to eventually record a narration demo. Any feedback on my performance is appreciated. By the way, I did modify the script somewhat in my recording--The original script used both cardinal (eg-eight) and ordinal numbers (eg-fourth, fifth, etc); therefore I tweaked it to all cardinal numbers in the interest of consistency. Also, I put the second "be cool and follow these rules" at the end in order to "wrap up."

    /sites/default/files/script-recordings/user-9567/script-recording-35959.mp3

    Peer Feedback:

    Welcome! I'm a teacher too but would tell you that, in general, your "teacher voice" is not the voice you'll want to use for VO work. Personal, conversational and friendly should be your goal here. Bring your volume down and imagine that you're speaking not to a whole class of kids but two or three in close proximity. Or even just one kid, seated at a computer with headphones on, watching an animated graphic or video demonstrating proper bus safety. Speak to that one kid, with lower volume but still the same clarity and enthusiasm. Good luck and best wishes as you start off your new school year!

    Peer Feedback:

    Good comment Bill. Spot on.

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    Bus Safety

    Script:

    Hey kids...Be cool and follow these rules. Remember, school bus safety starts with you every morning and every afternoon. So just keep these 10 rules in mind. They’re easy to learn and simple to follow. And they start before the bus ever stops. So be cool...and follow these rules. First, be on time for the bus. Second, never run to or from the bus. Third, stand back from the curb. Fourth, don’t push or shove. Fifth, stay in your seat. Sixth, don’t yell or shout. Seventh, always obey the driver. Eight, wait for the driver’s signal before crossing. Ninth, always cross at least 10 feet in front of the bus. And tenth, never crawl under the school bus.

    76 people have played this

    Practice Recording:

    Click to hear nettipo8's recording

    Thank you for listening to my practice recording! Any feedback is very much appreciated.

    /sites/default/files/script-recordings/user-2902/script-recording-80692.mp3

    Peer Feedback:

    Hi Nettie po,

    You have a unique sound to your voice! Probably why you're here. Your read was alright , just a little weak on the mike levels, just a tiny bit more conversational tone.

    Peer Feedback:

    The submission looks to be 2:14 long, so I was expecting 2 takes of this script. What I found was a long gap and then the CANDY submission at the end. Always good to proof your recordings and do some QC before uploading them.

    For children, the pace is a bit brisk. Instructions need to be laid out and made clear without talking down to them or sounding condescending (which you avoided). Kids know the difference and will tune out. That's why the message needs to be presented in a positive (and possibly entertaining) way (which you did).

    There are 10 things for them to remember, so that point is probably important and should be given a little emphasis.

    Peer Feedback:

    Thank you so much for the feedback! I realized my error right after I clicked the button (typical)--so, lesson learned; I will absolutely check my work before uploading it next time. I appreciate all the points you made here and on the actual Making Candy submission. I appreciate your taking the time to provide such thorough feedback.

    Peer Feedback:

    Hi! I really liked your the way you paced yourself, and the way you ended each sentence with a mark of friendly concern. Well done!

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    13 people have played this

    Practice Recording:

    Click to hear Crystal's recording

    When saving a recording, I notice that when I open and play it back that lately my recording cuts off early. It's become more common lately and is especially frustrating when I'm sending out auditions. Please let me know if I'm overlooking something when I save the file. Processing is very minimal. I only use Amplify Gain set at 232% and Noise Reduction Auto Spectral Subtraction at 25%. I save choosing VBR with a Minimum Bitrate set at 24 and maximum bitrate set at 128. Ideas out there?

    /sites/default/files/script-recordings/user-409/script-recording-36327.mp3

    Peer Feedback:

    Vocal performance - a little choppy and you voice is too low for this type of read.
    Recording - cant help you with all the technical stuff.

    Peer Feedback:

    Thank you and I heard what you heard. Back to the drawing board. When I play back the saved audio on my computer, it sounds loud enough. When I play back the audition audio before sending it out, it sounds loud enough also. But hear and now the copy is way too soft. Arrrgh! Not frustrated, just trying to get it right.

    Thanks so much for the comment. I really appreciate it.

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    Making Candy Video

    Script:

    What exactly goes into candy to make it so sweet and yummy? Join Professor Hoody on a fantastic journey to find out how candy is really made. In Making Candy, the professor’s quantum transporter sends him to a real chocolate factory to explore the candy world. You can just taste the excitement in this candy-coated adventure.

    33 people have played this

    Practice Recording:

    Click to hear finateria's recording

    Any feedback on my performance is appreciated.

    /sites/default/files/script-recordings/user-9567/script-recording-35960.mp3

    Peer Feedback:

    Certainly a "pop-screen/ pop-filter" required.
    Watch out for longer than usual pauses.
    Little more dynamic in pitching- it is, after all, for children.

    That said, I think you have what it takes.
    Nice VO voice.

    Peer Feedback:

    Nice enthusiasm but I think you could turn it up even more! And try playing around with inflection a bit. Consider which words should be hit and why. In the first line you hit "exactly" harder than "candy", for instance. Try reversing this and noticing the difference. Doesn't it make more sense to hit "candy" harder? Listen again and ask yourself, which are the key words here and do I hit those words? This is a good effort.

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    Making Candy Video

    Script:

    What exactly goes into candy to make it so sweet and yummy? Join Professor Hoody on a fantastic journey to find out how candy is really made. In Making Candy, the professor’s quantum transporter sends him to a real chocolate factory to explore the candy world. You can just taste the excitement in this candy-coated adventure.

    78 people have played this

    Practice Recording:

    Click to hear nettipo8's recording

    /sites/default/files/script-recordings/user-2902/script-recording-80698.mp3

    Peer Feedback:

    My guess is that this is a promo of sorts - either for a children's TV show or a video or some learning thing on the net.

    Certain points. "Making Candy" is probably the title of the program or video. The way I heard it here it just sounded like an activity. Just doing "air quotes" as you say the name will nearly always set it off vocally.

    Got the joyful smile in the last line, but "candy-coated" got smushed a little bit into sounding like "canny-coded".

    Watch the long A sound "...A real...". The short A, "uh", is probably more the way it would be said in normal conversation.

    First sentence - "...sweet and yummy" was more like "...swee dan yummy."

    Peer Feedback:

    I really love your voice! It was such a joy to listen to and fit the script well. It seems you grew in confidence as the narration went forward. The last line you totally nailed it. If you could start and end with such enthusiasm, the world will be your oyster.

    - Rhett

    Peer Feedback:

    Thank you! This is very encouraging. I will work on maintaining a more consistent enthusiasm throughout the piece.

    Peer Feedback:

    I didn't read this as a promo so much as an opening narration (think How It's Made)

    That being said, I thought it was pretty fast -way too fast for narration. I also agree that you should do the air quote thing on Making Candy.

    But your voice is just so perfect for a spot like this! :D

    Peer Feedback:

    Thanks, bean420--and again, I'm very encouraged by the feedback! Will definitely practice this one again but as a narration.

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    Nature's Recyclers - Discovery Kids

    Script:

    Did you know that mold and bacteria and higher level organisms like beetles, centipedes and, of course, earthworms are all busy recyclers? By breaking down organic matter - stuff like dead plants, poop, and decaying animals - they create valuable nutrients necessary for rich and fertile soil. Take it from me, a worm who knows, we are doing you a big favor.

    86 people have played this

    Practice Recording:

    Click to hear amydoesvo's recording

    I would love feedback on both performance quality and technical quality please - thank you so much!

    /sites/default/files/script-recordings/user-126671/script-recording-98827.mp3

    Peer Feedback:

    I get it. You're not a kid narrating a science promo, but rather a worm character. In my opinion, if you're an adult doing that voice, you have some nice acting skills. And if you're a kid doing the read, you're pretty advanced. Either way, I like it.

    If I were the director, I'd do another take with a faster pace, to see what that sounds like.

    really nice work,
    DS.

    Peer Feedback:

    I think your tone fits well with the script. Keep that tone and try another take where you go a bit faster and have a little more energy and I think you'll have a really good read!

    Peer Feedback:

    I really liked it, I can hear it coming from an animated character!

    Peer Feedback:

    Great performance. Your voice immediately transported my imagination to the days of reading Richard Scarry books with my kids. The clarity is terrific and the inflections were natural and casual for the character. I read this script while looking for practice scripts of my own and tried to picture it in my voice and couldn't. Now that I have heard it in yours, I can picture the character. The recording quality is great.

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    Online Educational Website

    Script:

    [Conversational, teacher talking to student:]
    The chart said that after nine to fourteen days, the caterpillars enter the pupa stage. That's when they make a chrysalis (chrys·a·lis) and start metamorphosis. //

    [Neutral/educational tone:]
    Michelangelo was one of the most talented artists of the Italian Renaissance period. Although his painting of the Sistine Chapel's ceiling is well-known, he is most famous for his work with marble. The statue David is often considered to be Michelangelo's greatest work. //

    [youthful, friendly talking to a child:]
    Camouflage is an adaptation that helps animals blend in with their surroundings and stay safe. My favorite marine animal uses camouflage. Its back is covered in polka dots, which make it hard to see against the rocky ocean floor.

    81 people have played this

    Audition Recording:

    Click to hear kenbond's recording

    Three different reads for an educational website. Target audience is 8-10 year olds.

    /sites/default/files/script-recordings/user-113659/script-recording-99617.mp3

    Peer Feedback:

    Very clear and precise and still very pleasant and friendly, great work! You might consider speeding up the tempo just a tad for one of the more conversational pieces, which would help showcase a little more variety. Also, the first sentence of that first piece came across a little scold-y to me -- like "Aha, you didn't do the homework..." when I think something like "Oh, good question!" might play a little better. The third piece was the strongest for me -- you captured that youthful excitement in your tone and made me smile. Hope you book it!

    Peer Feedback:

    All readings were well done, and I'm a fan of your voice and tonal quality -- however I didn't hear any change in tone, voice, pacing or energy between the thee and all had different direction given - (conversational teacher, educational, youthful speaking to a child).

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    Addition/subtraction

    Script:

    Karen has 5 oranges. Amy has 2 oranges. How many more oranges does Karen have than Amy?

    Good job, you’re right! Karen has 3 more oranges than Amy!

    I’m sorry, that’s not quite right – try again!

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on 4 recordings of this script that your peers recorded.

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    Addition/subtraction

    Script:

    Karen has 5 oranges. Amy has 2 oranges. How many more oranges does Karen have than Amy?

    Good job, you’re right! Karen has 3 more oranges than Amy!

    I’m sorry, that’s not quite right – try again!

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on 3 recordings of this script that your peers recorded.

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    Bus Safety Rules

    Script:

    Hey kids...Be cool and follow these rules. Remember, school bus safety starts with you every morning and every afternoon. So just keep these 10 rules in mind. They’re easy to learn and simple to follow. And they start before the bus ever stops. So be cool...and follow these rules. First, be on time for the bus. Second, never run to or from the bus. Third, stand back from the curb. Fourth, don’t push or shove. Fifth, stay in your seat. Sixth, don’t yell or shout. Seventh, always obey the driver. Eight, wait for the driver’s signal before crossing. Ninth, always cross at least 10 feet in front of the bus. And tenth, never crawl under the school bus.

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on a recording of this script that one of your peers recorded.

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    Clifford Cd Rom

    Script:

    Everybody loves Clifford on CD-Rom! Clifford and his pals make learning BIG fun with these CD-ROMS packed with exciting adventures, which help kids practice reading, memory skills critical thinking and more! Available where software is sold or at www.scholasticstore.com.

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on 2 recordings of this script that your peers recorded.

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    Disney Interactive Learning Software

    Script:

    Welcome to the Disney Interactive Learning series of software.

    Disney Interactive's Toddler series, featuring Mickey Mouse and Winnie the Pooh for children aged 18 months to 3 years. Mickey Mouse and Winnie the Pooh Kindergarten provide challenging educational activities for children aged 4 through 6, all in an atmosphere of gentle encouragement. Preschoolers aged 2 through 4 can join Mickey Mouse and Winnie the Pooh for educational fun and challenge in Disney Interactive's Preschool series.

    Children 5 to 8 can take an educational trip to Infinity and Beyond with Buzz Lightyear in Buzz Learning Grades 1 and 2.

    Disney Interactive's Ready to Read and Ready for Math make learning the basics rewarding and fun for children aged 4 through 6.

    Visit Disney Interactive's Learning web site for more information about the Learning Software Series. Register online to receive important information from Disney Interactive. Click here to learn about special promotions.

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on a recording of this script that one of your peers recorded.

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    Great Island Cd-rom Game

    Script:

    For 2000 years the Great Island World has prospered. I, the Good Queen, brought happiness and sunlight into this once bleak and dismal land. During the Battle of Darkness and Light, I was able to defeat the Evil Sorcerer, sending him into exile. But evil is returning to this peaceful place. The evil sorcerer is free once more to wreak havoc on my people. I must gather my allies together to fight this demon wizard. Good prevail over the evil shadows of annihilation.

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on 3 recordings of this script that your peers recorded.

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    Jupiter (kids)

    Script:

    Jupiter is by far the largest planet in our Solar System. The Earth could fit inside Jupiter more than 1000 times. It also has more gravity than the planet Earth. In fact, if you weigh 70 pounds on earth, you would weigh 185 pounds on Jupiter.

    Jupiter's great red spot, visible in the picture to your right, is where a giant storm has been raging for at least 300 years. This red spot is also called "The Eye of Jupiter" because of its shape.

    Did you know Jupiter has rings? They are faint and are only able to be viewed when Jupiter passes in front of the Sun. This is because the light from the Sun lights them up for us to see here on Earth. There are three rings in all. They are named Gossamer, Main and Halo.

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on a recording of this script that one of your peers recorded.

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    Kids Atv 1

    Script:

    Every day is an adventure with Activity TV. It’s the place to be for hundreds of Awesome activities in dozens of categories! Cartooning to magic to cooking and more – ready for you day or night. This month learn some gross out magic. Watch closely as Ryan teaches you to perform the severed finger trick!

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on a recording of this script that one of your peers recorded.

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    Kids Atv 2

    Script:

    Welcome to Activity TV Gross Out Puppet Theater. Everyone knows its fun to play with your food – but what about your utensils?? Well today, you’re going to learn how to make your own dirty spoon puppets!

    Sometimes we use tools that require adult supervision. So have fun creating these projects with an adult helper!

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on a recording of this script that one of your peers recorded.

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    Learn To Spell

    Script:

    Type in the letters to complete the word boy. The boy rode his bike to the park. Then click Check.

    Type in the letters to complete the word girl. The girl wore a yellow ribbon in her hair. Then click Check.

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on 2 recordings of this script that your peers recorded.

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    Making Candy Video

    Script:

    What exactly goes into candy to make it so sweet and yummy? Join Professor Hoody on a fantastic journey to find out how candy is really made. In Making Candy, the professor’s quantum transporter sends him to a real chocolate factory to explore the candy world. You can just taste the excitement in this candy-coated adventure.

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on a recording of this script that one of your peers recorded.

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    Making Compound Words

    Script:

    Let’s make some compound words. Put two objects into the machine to make a new word. Click on the lever when you think you have created a compound word. Sun. Sun. Flower. Flower. Sun flower. That’s right! You’re good at this! Now try another one!

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on a recording of this script that one of your peers recorded.

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    Photosynthesis

    Script:

    When it comes right down to it, we all gotta eat. But did you know while we snack away on chips and chocolate bars, that all around us are living things that require just the basics of sunlight, water, and air. Now that's what I call a diet.

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on a recording of this script that one of your peers recorded.

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    Temperature

    Script:

    Temperature is the measure of the degree of hotness or coldness of a person or object. The word comes from the Greek word “tempera” which means heat. Temperature is recorded using a thermometer, which is usually a thin glass tube with mercury or colored alcohol inside the column. These old-style thermometers work on the principal of the mercury or alcohol expanding and moving up the column when the air around it heats up, and contracting and moving down the column when the air cools. The units on the scale used to measure temperature are called degrees. There are two different systems of measuring: Celsius and Fahrenheit.

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on 3 recordings of this script that your peers recorded.

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    The Boatload of Knowledge

    Script:

    New Harmony (1825-1829): The Boatload of Knowledge
    The settlement of New Harmony in Indiana was established to allow its members to pursue the study of the sciences and natural philosophy without the encumbrances of modern, capitalist life. Its founder, social reformer Robert Owen, successfully lured away from Philadelphia an entire community of scientists who at the time were considered the brightest and most promising in the nation, including several founding members of the National Academy of Science. Many of these original settlers traveled by boat together to their new home in a journey that was referred to as the “Boatload of Knowledge.” The community thrived for four years before collapsing amid internal disputes over money. But it did succeed in establishing a western center of scientific discovery at a time when these activities were largely confined to the northeastern states.

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on a recording of this script that one of your peers recorded.

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    Wright Brothers

    Script:

    Their 12-second flight on Dec. 17, 1903 from Kitty Hawk, North Carolina, forever changed the world. Climb aboard a re-creation of history's first flight and relive the Wrights Brothers' daring quest to fly. Their inventions and ability to lift a machine into the sky dramatically altered the world in which we live, and here you're in the driver's seat to see how they did it. Become a "virtual Wright Brother" and experience what it was really like on their first four flights. Explore four fun fantasy flights and get a sense of how far Orville actually flew in the world's first flight. Come on, take to the skies!

    Recordings:

    Hear and comment on a recording of this script that one of your peers recorded.

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